Saturday, January 30, 2010

weather and Facebook

It snowed today.

We were supposed to get an inch... but we ended up with about 4 (as of the time I'm writing this)

I know I should be grateful that I live in a time where we can predict the weather. And I should be grateful that my housing keeps out the cold and I don't have to worry about losing a limb.

However I'm pretty pissed off at the weathermen. There is no other job where you can be totally completely wrong and STILL keep your job.

I'm demanding a letter of apology from all the local weather men. They were very inconvenient today.

Also I spent a lot of time on facebook and once again the side ad were more humorous then anything I could write.

This is what greeted me today.

That is the scariest picture EVER! Apparently if you don't get a scholarship a crazy homeless man will hang out in your house. Or something. You guys can provided a MUCH better caption.

In case you didn't know, I am starting up Be Nice To A Stranger again, but I'm calling it Project Nice and I'm inviting OTHER people to join in the fun. It starts on Monday. Please go check it out.

Friday, January 29, 2010

When it's NOT ok to be on your cellphone

I get it. I really do. We live in a society where we HAVE to be in CONSTANT communication with everyone.

However I think we've crossed a line.

Today I was going to use the public restroom. I walk in an mentally groan because someone else was in the other stall. I HATE having to go to the bathroom when someone else is there. In fact in my own house I will walk upstairs to pee if my family is downstairs.

So I go into the stall and start to, you know, do my thing. When I hear the woman next to me say "Oh great" followed by universal sound of urination.

So I assumed that whoever is next to me needed some encouragement to pee.

Then I hear her talking about moving money around and the hushed sound of another voice.



I don't like it when my husband hears me pee, now a stranger on the phone can hear me!

Then it dawns on me that whoever is next to me is talking on the phone while SHE'S PEEING.
So clearly she doesn't have my issues but still...

Now here's my other problem. I'm done. I finish up... now do I flush or wait her out?

Screw it--- I flush, I don't have my time where I can pee, and I've got stuff to do.

Then she flushes too.

I wash my hands.

Turn around and SHE GIVE ME A DIRTY LOOK.

Like I was the one who exposed the fact that SHE was peeing and talking on the phone by my flush.

People there is a line that should NEVER be crossed.

Today that line was crossed and I don't know how or if we can ever go back.

You may file that under TMI.

Wednesday, January 20, 2010

Weird stuff in my purse

Here's a fun little segment I'd like call,
The Weird stuff I carry around with me.

I am going to put my hand in my purse and pull out something then write it down. Are you ready?
Let's go:
1)Coupon for Let's Dish... note I couldn't find it when I was making my appointment a few days ago.
2) a paycheck stub
3) wallet
4) paycheck stub
5) Eeyore stackable toy the link is the closest thing I could find to what is in my purse
6) Capri Sun Roarin' water Berry flavor.
7) Phone for my friend
8)Receipt for Chick-fil-a
9) $4.00 in singles
10)A piece of paper with the word Melatonin written on it
11) Old Borders gift car-- it has like $2.00 on it
12) Sugar in the raw packet --- I know I have three of them
13) an envelope with my name on it--- I think it went to a christmas card from on of my students
14) Panera bread receipt
15) One baby sock... it's pink and white and looks like a pink shoe
16) A straw wrapper... not the straw, just the wrapper
17) Mucinex two count
18) Froggie hair barrette
19) Black bic pen
20 Gift card to Chick- fil- A Unused. (I like chick-fil-a a-lot)
21) Hair brush
22) USB flash drive
23) ibuprofen target brand
24) Matching baby sock
25) List of band recommened to me by one of my students: Coldplay, Oasis, Decemberist, John Mayer, Jack Johnson, Of Montreal, Deathcab for cutie, folded paper figures
26) Blue Sharpie
27) Push Pen
27) black flair pen
28) Wind up green caterpiller
29) Sugar in the raw packet
30( mint from Ruth Chris
31) Chapstick
32) Chapstick
34) Lipstick
35) 6 pennies.

So what's in your purse or pockets?

Thursday, January 14, 2010

International SPAM

I'm not talking about the Ham in the Can.

My last post had a comment from someone named JoJo. It was in a different language.
There was a huge debate if I should go through the effort of translating it.

Thankfully I did not.

Jessica, a fellow blogger, knew what it said.

It was a link to an "Adult" website.

I've been spammed by the adult entertainment industry before. I've gotten the e-mail of "look for sexy singles". I've had Porn Bots follow me on twitter. It's no secret that it's out there.

But it's a whole new low to post on a blog with 17 followers. This is what I would like to say to JoJo.

Dear, JoJo, if that is your real name, which I am betting its not.

It's rude to post links to "adult entertainment" on someone else's blog. My MOTHER reads this blog.
Worst of all you had to type in the Catcha in order to post a comment. Was your adult site worth decipher the code?

Look JoJo, all I'm saying is it's uncool. I work hard on this blog. I like it.. Don't litter it with your brightly color fliers of naked ladies or God knows what else. If you have a blog, be fore warned, you might get a link to a super cute youtube video of a kitten playing with a ball of yarn, and other wholesome images.

Because that's how you fight back against SPAM, you SPAM them right back with Kittens or Puppy Sized Elephants.

By the way, JoJo, you suck and you forgot to be awesome. You are made completely out of lame sauce. But you've just read those two sentences and probably thought what I said was very DIRTY.

Someone who remembers to be awesome

Wednesday, January 06, 2010

Goals/Predictions for 2010

My goals for 2010
1) Zoey will learn her ABC and get potty trained.
2) I will try not to make chicken every night I cook.
3) Learn all the lyrics to Diego and Dora, not just fumble through them like I do.
4) Talk to my husband, not just hi's and day to day stuff but deep stuff.

1) Find my desk
2) Raise my scores for assessments
3) Try new things every year.

1) Go to the gym more then once a week
2) Learn something new every day.
3) Take better care of myself

1) Finish 10th draft of NSAA= write 11th draft of No System At All
2) Revise New York Karma0- get it ready for a summer query
3) Start writing sequel to NSAA
4) maintain this blog and Be Nice To Strangers.

Whole foods stock will drop, mostly because the CEO is an idiot.
More e-reader will come out.
A new i-Pod will be released.<-- New ones come out every year-it's not much of a prediction.
Iron Man 2 will break box office records.
I will hate the new Doctor for three episodes then warm up to him.
I will be disappointed by the finale of LOST.
Fall Out Boy will break-up.
The Oscars have ten movies as nominations instead of 5 will only make the show longer and people will still not be interested.

Tune back in a year to see if I'm right.

Monday, January 04, 2010

Dinosaurs and my Daughter

I like Dinosaurs. I do. I think its fraking amazing that nature created dinosaurs. I think it's incredible that dinos lived for as long as they did. I think that stupid asteroid took out a good thing.

But I would also like to thank that asteroid because it might have taken 65 million years, but humans did take over.

I'm a human.

My daughter is a human too.

Yes I did state the obvious, but bare with me.

My daughter is just as amazing as a dinosaur.

She eats with her eyes closed.

When she's eating something she likes, she closes her eyes, and says "mmm mmm mmm".

When she sees me or and there's a clear path, she will run with her eyes closed.

She's so trusting that I will be there to embrace her, she closes her eyes, because she doesn't need to see me to know I'll me there.

Some call that faith. Some call that innocence.

My husband thinks its dumb because she inherited my clumsiness. And she does fall, A LOT. But she always falls with her eyes open.

Yes one day, I might not be there to catch her. One day, she might fall with her eyes closed. One day, she might eat with her eyes open. One day, she might not trust or be as innocence.

But just think one day, 65 million years ago Dinosaurs ran on this planet.

I wonder how many of them ran with their eyes closed, just because they like to run?

Not to much of a point here.

I like dinosaurs. I love my daughter.