Saturday I'm going to the NJ SCBWI Conference. I pretty much always write it wrong and say its the swbi, I don't know why.
It's in my hometown of Princeton, NJ. A place I haven't been to since my wedding, and yet in my mind I can still drive through all the streets.
I'm worried that it's changed. I'm worried I'll get lost and look like a moron.
What if the place I grew up changed and grew up itself? What if it's not the place of my memories?
A about a year ago a ran into a friend from high school, I couldn't recognize him. He changed, got older. I don't think I've changed very much, sure I have a career, a husband and a kid. But how much have I changed? I don't know. It's weird. I live with me everyday, I don't notice the differences.
Also I'm worried because I might puke on an agent's shoes. My last conference didn't go well-- as you know-- I'm wondering how low my bar is to consider this conference a success.
I've got my hopes up pretty high (which is always a mistake) because there is a small flicker of a thought in my head that this whole thing is a sign.
1) I haven't been home in 8 years.
2) I'm going to pitch a book I feel confident about. (sort of)
3) My dream agent will be there. (although I found out yesterday she is no longer interested in my topic.)
4) The book takes place in my hometown.
It seems like a perfect recipe.
So writers, do you have any hopeful dreams or illusions of grandeur or any signs for above?
Also is there anything you think I might need?