How not to play hide and seek

My daughter is 2 and half. It's very normal to look down on your child and think, 'you are the coolest' person on the planet. It's easy to only see the good.

I teach middle school and I'm immune to cute.

There are a few career options I'm going to go ahead and cross of the list of possibilities for my daughter.

Here's why.

She loves to play Hide and Seek.

98% of the time she hides on a blanket.

97% of the time she hides with me.

97% I ask her, "um, if I'm in here with you, who's supposed to come find us.
She answers back, "uuuuummmmmmm Subby." You know Subby, the dog who's scared of his own farts. Not exactly the smartest dog, he NEVER knows that we're playing hide and seek.
Now I'm in a dilemma. Do I shout out for the dog and hope he hears us and comes to find us? If I yell, I've defeated the whole purpose of hiding in the first place.
What to do, what to do?

Most of the time, we sit under the blanket until I get bored and change the game to something else.
Yep My daughter has a better attention span than I do.

The other 3% of the time, my daughter hides under MY shirt, the shirt I am wearing at that moment, and yells for me to find her.

I've scratched off Ninja as a possible career for her. I just don't think it's going to work out.

Flower girl

My daughter was sick last night. She had a coughing fit and threw up on my husband. Pink and chunky and stuff I didn't even know she ate.

Side note: Most interesting part about throwing up, examining half digested food-- highly gross, but still interesting. I didn't know it took over 10 hours for a blue berry to digest in my daughter's stomach... I also didn't know she was eating them whole and not chewing.

After the hazmat team cleaned up the mess (me- I was the hazmat team) our daughter opted to sleep in our bed.

Side note: My daughter is 2 years old and has slept in our bed a grand total of 3 nights in her life. You will see why in a few minutes.

For someone who weights 30 pounds and is about two feet tall, she knows how to take up a lot of space.

We propped her up, gave her stuffed animals to snuggle with. She was in the center of the bed. Instantly she rolled over to my hubby's side of the bed.

I had my normal amout of space. It was lovely, for me. A tiny body filled with love snuggling close by but didn't invade my personal space. Awesome.

At three oclock in the morning I woke up and looked over. My daughter was sleeping horzionalty across the bed. My hubby was curled up at the foot of the bed, (like our dog used to before he got kicked off the bed).

Time to do something about the situation. I picked her up and placed her back in her room.

6;45 rolls around, and I've been awake and moving for about a half hour. Hubby didn't sleep well and is slowly trudging around. I hear the stomping of little baby feet running back and forth between her room and ours.

She's awake.

VERY awake.

TOO AWAKE for any human being who hasn't be injected with coffee.

Our day continues, in the normal stressful manner it always does. The 10 minutes it takes for me to get out of my house is by far the loudest and most annoying of my day.

Dog barking.
Daughter trying on my shoes, instead of hers.
Daughter crying because I can't find her hat.
Daughter yelling at the dog to be quiet.
Me yelling at the dog to be quiet.
Dog stopped barking after treats were thrown to him.

Then we finally make it outside. I'm exhausted. I opened the car door to put all my stuff in it and my daugher has vanished.
Panic.
I scanned the yard and she's in the grass.
"NO! Get back here." I yelled and chased after her.
She has something in her hand. Was it dog poop I didn't clean up? A stick?
I snatched it out of her hand.

It was a tiny flower. "For mommy."

Instantly humbled, I loaded her into the car seat. I returned back to the flower (seriously I have
no idea how she saw it) and picked on for her.

I gave it to her.

Sometimes kids are pretty awesome.